The Kingdom of The Hessa Islands is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Nathan II with an iron fist, and remarkable for its zero percent divorce rate, aversion to nipples, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 8.43 billion Hessa Islanders are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Education, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Carthago Nova. The average income tax rate is 68.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Hessa Islandsian economy, worth a remarkable 1,285 trillion Hessa Marks a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Retail, and Woodchip Exports. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 152,537 Hessa Marks, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Arguments about toilet seats being left up or down get surprisingly heated, bargain-hunting is considered unpatriotic, many aides in Nathan II's office are known to be serial jaywalkers, and complaining about Christmas music in October is a ho-ho-horrendous crime. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Hessa Islands's national animal is the Eagle, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution.

The Hessa Islands is ranked 20,409^th in the world and 20^th in Fifth Empire for Most Subsidized Industry, scoring 7,078.73 on the Gilded Widget Scale.